//
you're reading...
Artistic, Comedy

Worth Pondering

Number 10: Life is sexually transmitted

Number 9: Good health is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can die.

Number 8: Men have two emotions: Hungry and Horny. If you see him without an erection, make him a sandwich.

Number 7: Give a person a fish and you feed them for a day, teach a person to use the internet and they won’t bother you for weeks.

Number 6: Some people are like a Slinky .. Not really good for anything, but you still can’t help but smile when you shove them down the stairs.

Number 5: Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in hospitals dying of nothing.

Number 4: All of us could take a lesson from the weather. It pays no attention to criticism.

Number 3: Why does a slight tax increase cost you $200.00 and a substantial tax cut saves you $30.00?

Number 2: In the 60’s, people took acid to make the world weird. Now the world is weird and people take Prozac to make it normal.

And The Number 1 Thought: We know exactly where one pig with swine-flu is located among millions and millions of pigs in America but we haven’t got a clue as to where millions of illegal immigrants and terrorists are located. Maybe we should put the Dept. of Agriculture in charge of Immigration

Advertisements

About carpebootium

I am a modern-day pirate. I travel the world and trade in today's currency, information. I sail through opportunity, comedy, history and strategy to turn turbulent into tournament, chaotic into cathartic, and embarrassing into emboldening. There are none who should fear me save two: Those who have what I want and those who get in my way. Are you done sailing your calm waters with strong undertow? Have you your fill of empty treasure and oasis destinations? Well good...come and join my crew! We're a lively lot from all over the world but be forewarned...anyone attempting to drop anchor will be thrown overboard, shot, harpooned and then marooned on an isle of cannibals. We move on! If you are ready...welcome aboard the Carpe Bootium!

Discussion

No comments yet.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: